wow, i seem updating everyday eh.. dunno update for wad also..

well my eyes are very very red these few days, dunno why. may be cos of the excessive crying+ tired eyes+ my dry contacts.. it shld be so ba.. its very very red.. i may be blind soon! hurhur.. i'm like keep cursing myself lidat, always saying i'm like dying soon etc..

i haven got my directions right till now, i dunno where to head to, where to walk to.. its kinda confusing also ah.. i'm also working less now since i wan to rest and take time off.. but when i take the day off, i dun seem to be spending it fruitfully..

i wake up at 1sth, nv take lunch or breakfast, go online after i brush teeth etc.. then also dunno how i pass the time also..time slowly turns better when my parents are home..

well i have the best parents in this world..hur although we are not that rich, they cant provide me with my matertialistic needs but well.. they're still the best. my dad rang me juz now in the afternoon cos he's gonna go over to sentosa cove to deliver goods..

well sentosa cove is juz HEAVEN!! a place where i wan to be, when there is the sea in front of your house, where we are living now is earth, sentosa cove is heaven. the sea breeze, the sea in front of your house.. a place where i wan to run and escape to..

we seem to have lesser and lesser things to talk about, you're drifting further and further. i just wan us to be like before, i'm not asking anyth much, not asking u to hold my hands and run away to a faraway place where no one will find us.. i know its impossible.. it still hurts very badly though..

jerr-
10:43 PM

it'll be a month in 21 mins time.. this month was nice and sour.. i had one and a half weeks of pure sweetness and two and a half weeks of torture.. it was heaven then hell.. where would i be in days to come?

i would really want to be in heaven and not hell

i've been having alot of dreams these few nights, dunno why but its all revolving ard the same thing larh, which is WIERD!!!!! how can one have similar dreams in a few nights?!?! oh wells..

had quite a long day today.. went out with fc pple to buy materials for the making of gcma boards, then went ard hunting for ahzi de cd.. in the end the deluxe one not out yet, will only be out on fri.. grrrr..

ya then went ard walkin in town, particularly in lucky plaza SK, we spent quite some time in there talkin to the staff and crapping abt ahzi..wahah then i manage to get another reciept holder, thanks ester for that!! cos my dearest ahzi went to spoil my previous reciept holder.. but nvm! thats the only special reciept holder u can ever find in this world.. unless she did that to someone also larh..hahahha

then walk ard in paragon to look at bakerzin's mooncake cos wanna give to that aunty nxt wed.. then eat at wisma, crap there again.. we got tons of things to crap abt ahzi man.. from 4th oct to gcma red carpet etc..

its nice and lucky to be able to see her once a month.. we've been seeing her once every month, which is very good as compared to others le.. we're very lucky so learn to count our blessings!:)

jerr-
11:39 PM

tears flowed again when i heard yutian.. gosh.. i've been in a very very low mood today, low until basement level..

i thought i would be okay soon but i doubt i am.. i always think that pple are dumb when i see them clinging on to sth that they are unsure of, but me myself is doing it now.. it getting worst and worst each day.. two more days

work today was bad i think.. i cudnt guide properly, cant concentrate properly.. but everyth was okay overall.. the otters are damn cute!! they have soft and tiny paws which are like baby hands, dally and danster one's are better than the 5 boys de..haha so sweet..

anw,finally finish work smoothly but hmms mood still very very low larh mayb cos no enough slp..

ya i wan to complain!! wah lau ahzi made me woke up at 730am today whn i work at 1 and i can slp until 11.. wanted to listen to 933 for the 4th oct details.. gosh mali and ma really knows how to drag things, they only annouce the details at like 930?!?!?!? i was awake for 2 hrs listening to radio!! but okay lah at least i caught the method to win the tickets.. and got details.. not bad larh..

then i was so tired like hell, cant possibly slp at 10 adn wake up at 11!! so came online to give details etc.. then i went work with blood-shot eyes, they said my eyes were bloody red..hurr

very jialat larh, i've been tryin to bury myself in fc stuff adn work so that i wun have much time alone to think abt sooooo many things.. but i thought of ALOT in the end..

i was thinking, i work everyday so hard for wad? whn i work everyday, i dun have time for myself, my frens etc.. if i dun work, i wun have money.. money is impt in this world now, ya i may seem so money faced, but come to think of it, alot of things u would need money to buy de lor.. if u have no money u cant buy them..

anw, was thinkin, why shld i work so hard like shit when there are like %^&*()_ assholes working tog with us but not doing anyth.. they are juz useless, they come to waste time and make us angry but they get paid in the end like us, why shld i be the 'useful' worker instead of 'useless' ones? we get paid in the end, useless pple juz sit and do nth all day, they are not tired at all, but bloody us have to slog our hearts out and get ourselves so tired..

ya i do think alot.. okay yes i do.. i very emo today larh, watch show also can cry, its like so wad the hell..
为 什 么 两 个 相 爱 的 人 不 能 在 一 起 呢 ？ 可 能 是 因 为 他 不 再 爱 她 了 。 但 她 还 是 依 然 爱 着 他 .


我 的 泪 还 在 流 ， 心 还 在 滴 着 血 。 心 碎 了 ， 你 听 到 了 吗 ？ 好 想 回 到 从 前 那 段 快 乐 的 日 子 ， 我 们 两 快 乐 的 一 起 过 日 子 ， 天 上 没 星 星 ， 但 都 觉 得 天 空 是 为 了 我 们 而 亮 起 ， 因 为 我 们 是 天 身 一 对 。 不 管 别 人 怎 么 看 ， 我 们 活 在 我 们 的 童 话 世 界 里 。

好 想 听 你 说 ， 我 们 回 到 过 去 的 日 子 吧 ， 一 起 看 到 更 多 美 丽 的 明 天 。 我 还 在 等 待 ， 希 望 你 会 说 给 我 听 。 我 只 听 你 的 甜 言 蜜 语， 不 听 你 说 你 不 爱 我 。

wah wah!! i can go write books!! very good rite?? not bad ah?? :))

jerr-
11:18 PM

dun ever comment on shows which u think are dumb, cos u will end up doing the things that they did which u think are dumb in the end. i always tot that waiting for someone is dumb in shows but sometimes u have to see if tt person is worth it or not..

wad is shown in drama is all dramatic. it wun happen in real life, dun believe in lies, its all virtual reality that will not happen.. they are all lies.. hurhur, wah i critise until like everyth is so cham lidat..wahaha make sure no scriptwriters see my this post..hahah

wad love drama, korean, japanese drama or wadever dumb dramas are all fake de larh.. it wun happen de lor, dun believe in it..hur.. u'll juz keep on dreaming abt it..haha

i shld go film ahzi de yutian's mv larh.. i'm so suitable.. yutian has been the only song that is playing in my phone everytime i on my music player, every morning whn i go work, it will juz keep on playing and playing, the scenes came into mine, all those juz came rushing back., its good larh, cos i wun be able to cry in the MRT or sth, so its good..

when will everyth be okay? i duwan it to end, thats not the way i wan it to be..nah nvm, life goes on still isnt it? tues is the day to look forward to.. i was looking forward to tmr cos ahzi album release but realise only releasing on tues.. life still goes on but its juz messy ard

realise sch hol is long, i've been working non stop for 3 weeks already! besides working i also dunno wad to do during hols, shopping? gg out? dating? haha non of the above leh..haha takkiare dudes. i'll be alright! thks for all those tags, i will be okay soon! i love u guys

jerr-
9:53 PM

is it all over?



everyth is like a negative, whn its exposed to sunlight, the negative spoils. juz like my heart, it got hurt and its dead now. do i have to use past tense for all the memorise we've got?

its even more hurting than before when u said its over, rather than hanging on and hoping that there would be a glimpse of hope.

the hurt that is inflicted now is much more hurting than wad i was going through that time.



the first tear which i dropped whn i saw the change in the words you said and the change in that website.

jerr-
9:41 PM

for once, i hate ahzi's new song.. okay hate in terms of the lyrics and the situation i am in.. she sings it damn well with her superb feelings. the song is nice, really but its an ultimate tear jerker song for me now, the lyrics describes fully the situation i am in now.

雨天
作词∶小寒 作曲∶李偲菘

站在十字路的交点
该怎么走
我却只想回头
除了你给的伞
我再也没有
别的借口去拥有你的什么

你能体谅我有雨天
偶尔胆却你都了解
过去那些
大雨落下的瞬间
我突然发现
谁能体谅我的雨天
所以情愿回你身边
此刻脚步
会慢一些 如此坚决
你却越来越远

牵手和分手来自同一双手
做回朋友 我却为何不懂挽留

你能体谅我有雨天
偶尔胆却你都了解
过去那些 大雨落下的瞬间
我突然发现
谁能体谅我的雨天
所以情愿回你身边
此刻脚步
会慢一些 如此坚决
你却越来越远

是否太晚
路已走远
我的眼眶泪太满
走不回你身边

你能体谅我有雨天
偶尔胆却你都了解
过去那些 大雨落下的瞬间
我突然发现

谁能体谅~我的雨天~
此刻脚步 会慢一些 如此坚决
你却越来越远

jerr-
9:53 PM

ultimate tear jerker songs for me by ahzi, top ten sad songs:

1. LEAVE
2.WO BU NAN GUO
3. HEN HAO
4.HAI PA
5.LEAVE ME ALONE
6.YAN LEI CHENG SHI
7. KAI SHI DONG LE
8.YING XIN REN
9.WO BU AI
10......
.
.
.
.
.
.
the ultimate one
.
.
.
.
YUTIAN

they are not placed according to order but they are the ten songs i shldnt listen to now, cos every song has a sentence that activates my tear glands and make me tear. in my kind of situation larh, no one noes wad situation i'm in but, if u do, pls dun listen to the ten songs listed above..

heard leave, ylcs,leave me alone, hai pa on the mrt RANDOMNLY in the mrt in the morning, i played randomnly, and those songs were played, is it fated?? HAI PA was the most jialat one, i could feel my nose turning itchy, eyes funny funny then i saw a tear in my eyes, a blur circle in front of my eyes ON THE MRT!!!!

but i managed to ctrl.. haha then now i heard yutian, oh my god, this is juz nerve wreaking and tear jerking song.. pls dun listen whn you are sad, HIGHLY FLAMMABLE, VERY DANGEROUS, MAY CAUSE EXPLOSIVE REACTION..

yutian one min ver

你卻越來越遠
是否太晚
路已走遠
我的眼眶 淚太滿
走不回你身邊

你能体諒我有雨天
偶爾膽卻你都了解
過去那些 大雨落下的瞬間
我突然發現

誰能體諒
我的雨天
此刻腳步會慢一些
如此堅決
你卻越來越遠

jerr-
10:57 PM

hurhur juz saw my work schedule today.. wahahaha from today onwards until nxt fri, i'll be working DL EVERYDAY!!! which is like 9 to 6.30 pm EVERYDAY! wahahaha soon u'll see a tanned and dry jiamin.. or rather a tired, dried and tanned sotong..hahaha

read her blog, she ended her story before me. very soon i'll have s similar post as her.. i wonder how long i can take it, how long i can last, how long more before i give up. i'm not giving up now larh.. i wun wan to..

爱情树: 张智成

我不要你在我身边
却看着蓝天
不看我的脸
我但愿你快乐的飞
将来要相爱都还有时间
风开始在吹
孤独好直接
爱最苦的是不能相依偎
然而我会等着你你
回来的季节
我的爱情是一棵树
永远不会离开一步
风雪多残酷我想我挺得住
我的生命是一棵树
只愿成为你的归宿
我义无反顾
守护你是最大的幸福
最深的温柔是成全
我张开双臂
任凭你来回
最痛的时候就思念
扎了根的心
不可能撤退
风开始在吹
孤独好直接
爱最苦的是不能相依偎
然而我会等着你回来的季节
我的爱情是一棵树
永远不会离开一步
风雪多残酷
我想我挺得住
我的生命是一棵树
只愿成为你的归宿
我义无反顾
从日落到日出~oh~
我的爱情是一棵树
永远不会离开一步
风雪多残酷
我想我挺得住~oh~
我的生命是一棵树
只愿成为你的归宿
我义无反顾
守护你是最大的幸福

jerr-
10:09 PM

i was high ystd over my results ah.. but today jiu low le.. sucks leh my GPA is 3.33 NIA!! wth!! its not very high larh..

haha my expectations was like 3.6??? ya but abit impossible larh, unless all my subs are like Z or As larh.. heh nvm its okay i'll be okay after tonight..

i'm juz too highly competitive larh, cos i nv get Z mah, then abit sad larh.. okay i know i'm not smart larh but oh wells.. there's still no z for me.. hur =( btw Z is dist which is better than A..

went out with derick,joan,roseann and ben today.. shop ard orchard.. went ard to find that ^&*()&^ X_LARGE shop.. in the end, dun have the cap i wan.. but i saw a jacket which i like! haha shall save for it, watched little man.. oh gosh, sucks man so lame larh.. waste my money.. haha

other than this, nth to update leh.. haha tmr another working day for me! oh ya juz now they were saying that i'm so tanned now! i look like indian now larh! but seriously i looked damn tanned now.. i'm so dark, i think i need to carry a torch with me whenever i go out nxt time..

oh no! then if sch reopens, i'll be more tanned larh, then no one can recognise me anymore.. cos i'll look 100% like indian, hahaha i shld go whitening soon..wahah

tata! tats all for today, takkiare guys and gals who read this! love loves!!

jerr-
10:38 PM

i'm happy today!!*beams* hahahaha here are my long awaited results:

org beh: B
BCS:B+
Commskill:B
Mircoecons:B
RHT:B+
APEL1:P
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

and intro!!!!!!!!!!!!

guess wad!!


intHt:A!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wahaha i'm so so so so happy over my intro!! i got my A back okayyyy pple, from A to B and from B back to A.. ahaha hard work does pay off de..

got the results sms this afternoon while working larh, lucky it was good, if not i will have no mood to work anymore, and its like i saw it at 2 sth when there is 2 more shows down before i knock off..haha

but other subs, okay larh i'm sooo surprised by my BCS, oh my god to think i got a B+ larh, got that + sign somemore leh! i got a weak A for my BCS projs, then my paper is cfm cannot make it de larh, also dunno wad i write, but dunno why it turned out to be a B+, BUSINESS COMPUTING SKILLS LEH!! oh my god..

RHT another funny one larh.. B+ also, haha one sub which i dunno wads gg on up till now and i got a B+ for that.. haha, quite sad for commskills, i tot i cud get an A for tt, cos proj A, then my tests all A leh, think my presentation or wad pulled me down larh.. dunno!econs, haha can get B already very good le.. OB, okay larh, cos we did very badly for proj, think C or sth larh, then 65% of my total marks depends on my final paper wad, so gettin a B for overall can mean that i got a B for paper larh, so okayy larh.

i'm happy over my results:)

one thing to say, hard work does pay off, if u put ya heart and soul into achieveing ya goals, nth is impossible :) i said i will get my A back for intro, and i did!!=D

ps: ms goh! i got my A back wor!! hahahaha (put for fun de larh, juz to haolian nia!)

juz emailed ma a few days ago telling her everyth is going on very fine for me, she was happy for me larh, haha i hope this kind of life stays on, so i'll be happy everyday, go work or go sch, come home, slack sleep, rest.. haha nice life eh??

but there's always an empty hole in my heart cos i'm still waiting for u to come and occupy the space, i'm waiting.

jerr-
10:52 PM

yes yes everyone i've got a new blog!! haha cos i forgot my previous blog username and pswrd, so decided to create a new one instead..

haha it'll juz be a plain and simple one, update here whn needed lor.. this is an open blog anyway, got another one which is erm.. haha private i think?!?!

didnt go work for two days, so got nth better to do at home, so created this new blog here larh.. haha tired of work somehow.. i dun understand why there are stupid pple ard working and they are juz useless? nvm i shall not complain that much, i'm juz a part-timer yea?? haha but i love my job, really..haha

results gonna be released on thurs.. wahahah i'm not at least a bit worried i also dunno why. cos i have been busy with work ba i think.. haha i was reminded of it when i saw ms goh's nick, which is yes my darlings, results are out this THURSDAY. then ben came and talk to me abt it, then i remembered..hurhur.. we shall see on thurs if i manage to get any A not.. haha

i juz told my mum that i'm very happy with life now, am i?? i seem to be happy with it larh, i have a job, i can get to rest at home, ahzi is releasing her album soon, i get to crap with fc frens in conver nowadays.. but i juz lack that you, that particular you that i know on 27th aug

i wun presurise u or to dunno wad larh, u need time, then i shall give u, but sometimes in life, u juz need an ans to everyth. i know my own feelings, i know it best myself, dun let history repeat itself again ba..

well so long guys i got nth more to update le haha !! oh anw, yutian is juz simply nice.. ahzi new song, listen le will cry ah..

jerr-
4:55 PM